I hate the person that i have become today.
some days are better than others,
there are days when i pretend to be alive
when really i feel dead inside
but there are days that am in a flat sate
how can i smile when am just not happy?
how can i talk when i just have nothing to say
i make promises and fail miserably at fulfilling.
i can no longer look at myself in the eye.
i tell myself that everything’s gonna be alright,
when i know nothing can be alright.
I lie to myself n it’s the worst of its kind.
i blame my conscience,
my memory, my scratch my walls, i shout my lungs out,
i cry a little and it just adds up to the pool of tears i’ve already created.
Every time i wanna do something to eradicate the pain,
my scar just spreads a little extra, to remind me that its not worth. It fades away the courage i’ve summoned, it tranquilizesmyfeelings and it makes the attempt go sour. i'm wasted.
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