A child Died tonight

A child died tonight and the whole world came to see

tuning in from coast to coast glued to their TV.

Microphones and camerass hoving in for the best bite.And I, standing on the outside,felt it wasn’t right.

Dignity is what was missing as the media scrambled around.

Compassion never had a chance upon that killing ground.A child died tonight and madness reigned free.

How do I know you ask?You see, that child was me.

Evil

My heart is colder than a winter

so dont love me

please let me go

i'll break youre heart and toss it and break it

and then give it to you

am selfish

am stingy

you were my cure

and i was your disease

you were saving me

and i was killing you!

innocence

I never felt a thing before you touched my heart and when you touched my body,

I thought I'd fall apart.

When you kiss my lips,

I feel you deep within my soulthen you wrap your arms around meand say you'll never let me go.

When I tremble at your tenderness and melt in your arms,

I know you really love me,

and you'll keep me safe from harm

you know I've never loved or been loved in any kind of way

so I cry for my loss of innocence and the things I gave away

Just listen

I have worn myself out by running from the truth.

And now the mirrored image haunts me.

So just listen

I am without speech,

for my words are offensive.

I am without sight,

for it is clouded.

I am without heart,

for it has hardened.

I am without sound,

for it has muffled.

I am without soul,

for it has drowned

Why is life full of questions?

I have loved,

lost and lived

How do I trust,

how do I love again

I should move on,

it's all in my past

But my pain remains,

continues and lasts

This pain lingers in my heart,

mind and soul

Damn it -

why is this world so cold?

Must say

If these trees could talk,

you'd know my body is dead,

my mind has been taken over,

that's why I am so scared,

I can't control it,

anger is making me blind,

I've been left here on my ownchained to a hate of some kind.

what am i doing here?

I should've been dead 20 years ago!

?

what do you do when it all falls down?

who do you turn to when the only person in the world that can stop you from crying is exactly the one making you cry?

How do you feel when the person you love, loves someone else?

life is full of questions

but we get no answers

i dont have an answer but i do know the cold reality

A broken soul to wither to dark skies

The reality seeping through my mind,

Clashing hearts,

Yet one of a kind.

Crucified words

To the point that nothing

Means something.

Sometimes is just better to lay down

and cry

DOnt ask me

If am scared of dying

well let me ask you this;

Can you see me?

No, you looked right through me.

My pain I wearlike a patchwork quilt.

Surely you saw mein these multi-colors?

Pain, regret, sorrow, rejection.

Each square a tributeof its own to my stupidity.

See the threads?

They are my tears,connecting one painfulmemory to another.

so dont ask me if am scared of dying

becuase am already dead!

Just like me!

You are just like me,

You're stuck inside of it,

can't you see??

No matter how you plead,

no one listens,

Can't you hear me?

I'm screaming,

"Please! Help me

This is not a dream

welcome to my world

My world of lonelyness

of sorrows

of pain

but don't be scared

this is just

my world!

Cell

Why have I chosen to live like this?

The answer,

my dear,

evades even me.

Perhaps because I think it is safe,

Or perhaps it's because they won't let me be.

Have you ever built a wall around you?

Encased yourself in an impenetrable shell?

Sometimes it may feel like it is right,

When actually you're trapped in a prison cell.

Captive

Sitting alone in a quiet corner,

Looking out at the people in the room.

To have just one of them notice me,

Would break down this solitary tomb.

Such a tomb have I created,

So sturdy,

so tall,

so secure,

so strong.

I used to think this was where I belonged,

But I get the feeling I may have been wrong.

Crimson Tears

A thunderous silencebreaks through my thoughts.

What was once many great ideas is now a triumph,

lost.

Baffling words tumble through my mind.

Reflections of darkness hover.

A disturbing peacefulness beckons to me,

and inside myself,

I take cover.

What would it be like to stay there forever?

To be lost in all my cares?

From the inside,

looking out -I cry silent tears.

losing

losing all I can see.

nothing remains.

dripping slowly away the tides recede

and I stand alone.

I look down from the precipice

that is my life and wonder where the tides go.

will they return to fill my gaping soul?

or will the waters dry to flow no more and leave me standing and breathless?

all I can do is wait.

watching from my precipice,

all I can do is wonder.

lost

Confusion

Anxiety

Anger

andPain

Despair

Hatred

Isn't it all the same?

Turmoil

Anguish

Pity

and Revenge

Spurn

Condemn

When is it going to end?

Loneliness

Heart ache

Must I be disturbed?

Desolate

Forlorn

Will I always be alone?

Yesterdat- today

yesterday i learned of love

today i learned of the pain that it can cause

i dont know whats love anymore

or if is even true and inocent anymore

i only know that it caused me pain

the day that you left

and so i dont want love anymore

if is going to cause me so much pain and feel so torn

Eternity?

Wandering in darkness grope,

Finding not a glimpse of hope.

Fingers touch to find my way,

Each foot fall, my heart betrays

The fear which drives me through the day.

Suddenly the ground is lost,

Flailing arms as body's tossed.

Splashing down in crimson pool,

The warm embrace is much too cruel,

I curse this lowly, wretched fool.

Floundering in this self made hell,

Warmth increasing as I dwell,

Within the confines I create,

Screaming as myself berate,

Giving in to this, my fate.

My....

My soul drifts aimlessly in times of hopelessness.It searches tirelessly for meaning and truth ...Yet finds no direction.

My heart bleeds quietly in times of loneliness.It yearns to find warmth and happiness ...Yet it somehow eludes me.

My eyes seek out visions in times of want.They gaze endlessly through the blackness that envelops them ...Yet they cannot see the light.

My ears listen earnestly in times of silence.They search for familiar sounds to comfort and console ...Yet they cannot penetrate the darkness that surrounds me.

My arms reach out frantically in times of despair.They seek strength and compassion to enfold me ...Yet they find nothing substantial to enwrap.

My mind cries out desperately in times of solitude.It poses intense questions that demand answers ...Yet there are none to be found.
My hand reaches out earnestly in these times of confusion.It dials the number of a familiar and calming voice ...And gratefully, my lifeline to sanity ... remains intact.

No title

If a broken heart could cry a river

To float my boat upon

I would cry all night my love

and in the morning be gone

to travel far away from here where no one knows I cried

because you told me you don't love me

and a part of me has died

Just Let go!

What we thought was love and happiness?

Is now gone all that's left is to move on.

Say goodbye and walk away.

Take your wounded pride put it aside.

The game of love you have lost.

Your broken heart is the cost.

Count your blessings and pray.

maybe You will win at the game of love one day.

Just learn when to walk away.

Your strong enough to say good bye.

Don't hold back it's okay to cry love hurts sometimes

ALways there

Day after Days,

Night after Night,

The world moves as I stay still.

Staring at my plain dark bedroom wall.

Mother knocks on my door,

but I feel too numb to answer

She cries,

but I motionlessly don't answer.

I lie on my bed,

Screaming in my head.

Pain forever with me never leaving.

It goes with me everywhere.

Like my shadow,

Constantly there.

Colors

It's not in the white that you really think,

Nor is it in the black.

It washes over us as we peer into the gray.

For in the white, all seems well.

The gray is hidden, and the brightness

Makes us grin and close our minds.

And in the black...we cannot dare to look.

It is what we do not want to see.

It reigns in the shadows of our souls.

Out of fear we turn our back.

If you leave

If you leave my love, you would take my heart with you

If you leave

I will be heartless for the rest of my living days

If you leave

I will lose my all being my reason to breathe

If you leave

I will always love you till the days of my linving days

If you leave

Not here

I am not here,

Not physically,

Not mentally,

Not here.

I am not here,

Not in your eyes.

To you,

I am nothing less,

Than nothing more.

Compared to me,

All is perfection,

Contrasted to me,

Everything.

In the mirror of your love,

I have no reflection...

Passing me by,

With the noise of silence.

Last Breath

She's sitting alone,

eyes in a daze

Her life a map of confusion,

her world like a maze

She holds her head high and wipes back the tears

The words I don't love you echo in her ears

She clasps her hands and bows her head

Is my life over or am I simply dead?

I cant promise

I can’t promise you that I will never stop loving you.

If only you felt the same way That I do then maybe you Would understand why.

You say that I don’ tKnow what love is.

So you say, then tell me What is love to you?

Love to me is like a Roller coaster that I Can never get off of.

It has its ups and downs.

It has its good and bad peaks.

It is an ectasy of sweet fruit,You can just never get enough.

I am like a child and you’re candy,

I want you more and more everyday.

Release

I'm a free spirit that has been shot down and wronged I pleaded for help a kind gentle mercy My heart felt like it rose up to my throat as you choked the life from me I cried with pain; can barely speak your name Throat swelling burning like a flame This fire this burning I'm yearning for help This is all I have ever felt My life as its slipping Veins running cold My blood as its churning its last My lungs choking for air breathing heavy And nobody is there to hold me tight Or watch this site as I fall to my knees In a last try to be set free abandoning all of me

No one

Sometimes I sit and stare

I think and hope that life would be fair

Nobody seems to get it

They just have no clue

That I can be a friend that is really true

Everybody whispers

All the laughs, the jokes, nobody cares

The way they all make fun of my frizzy red hair

or even the red high heels that i wear

If only life could be easy

I wish that life could be fun

I wish I didn't have to run and hide

Did you know?

did you know?...

did you know that I secretly cry and tear myself to shreds every night?

did you know that behind my seemingly warm happy eyes lies a broken innocent, ravaged by many sinful hands?

did you know that I loathe you for disposing and abandoning me in this forsaken hell?

did you know that I bleed for you, that I dwell in this eternal pain for you, that you bind me to this duty?

did you know that you intertwined you and I and left me to take care of our withering souls?

did you know that for every smile I forcefully press against my face a slit is placed upon my delicate skin?

did you know that everyday you kill apart of who I am, that every time you scream at my wrenching, contorting face I grow number?

do you even know that I exist anymore?

She.

Her eyes are swollen.

Her cheeks are red.

Tears pouring out of the lonely girl.

Love was all she asked for.

She got walked all over.

It seemed that no one cared for what she believed in.

As she lays in her bed, saying a prayer to make the pain go away.

She can't sleep, so she steers at his picture.

Trying to put the memories in her past.

She's waits to see, how she's going to make it.

As she struggles to get out of bed, thinking of what went wrong.

She has lost all the faith and all the happiness.

She is lost in the waking of her day.

This feeling

Rainy days and cold nights,These are days I need you to hold me tight in your arms,

Hold me close and keep me warm,

Tell me I'm your good luck charm,

Look me in my eyes and tell me I'm the one for you ,

Tell me I'm your every wish come true,Lay me down very gently,

Then make love to me essentially,

Caress my body from head to toe not missing a spot,

Lets play around like connect the dots,

Lets make each other hot till our body heat rise like a rollercoaster ride,

Take my body on a journey that never ends,

It always seems to just begin,Make me climax like i never done before,

Do what you want to my body its all yours,

Rub me, lick me, kiss me, tease me

do what ever you want to my body as long as its pleasing