MIss u!

Tears fall upon my pillow;

tears spill onto my cheek,

For words, I’m told,

the man I loved, to someone else did speak.

Perhaps I’d do things differently,

but atlast, I never knew.

Why is it you can’t care for me, the way I do for you?

Did you know how much I missed you, when you were not around,

Or how much you helped to cheer me up, when I was feeling down?

Even now, I find that I still want to talk to you awhile.

I remember just how easily you could make me smile.

I hate myself, because I know I hunger for your touch.

I never knew it possible to miss someone so much.

The Way

The way you smile

The way your eyes shine

The sheer beauty of our love

The feeling of being lost in time

Of everlasting tranquility

The way you make me see

Our heart and soul joined together

For all eternity

The way you make me laugh

The way you hold me when I cry

A love so deep and special

Will never end in goodbye

The natural high I feel when I'm with you

The way you love me....

So endless, sweet and true

Now can you see

All the reasons

I love you

I...

I want you in my lifeso much more then anyone else

I want us to be togethertogether forever

I want to be lovedfor who

I am not for who you want me to be

I want your loveno one else's

I want to feel your touchsoft in gentle like no other

I want to hear your voiceso calming in fear free

I want to hear you say you love me more then anything

I want your lips to kiss mefor the very first time

I want to walk with youhand in handI want your arms around meso

I feel safe in protected

I want you to hold mejust cause you can

I want you to hold me even morewhen

I cry

You.

You asked me if I loved youcame yes was my reply-but with my tender heart I worryabout the tears in your eyes-You asked me if I still wanted youstill desired your loving touch-my reply was yes dearyou'll never know how much-You asked me if I missed youwhen you're not at home-and without hesitation I repliedmy loneliness won't leave me alone-You asked me if I could go onif we should ever part-my reply was to youit would surely break my heart-You asked me what I would doif my love you betrayed-I told you in a whisperI'd just turn and walk away-You asked me if I would believeif other's told me lies-I told you I'd find the truthhiding in your eyes-You asked me if I'd tell youthat I'd fallen out of lovewith you-with a nervous smile I repliedthat's something I'd never do

Between us

Little pieces put togethera mosaic of memories

,tiny bits that make it whole,like a cracked window,through which people see.

A tired broken heart,of jagged glass that lie,

in sparkling pieces on the ground,and with trembling hands,

I cradle them with woeful sighs.the delicate pieces of my love,

the shining joy of my adolescence,

reflections of my sorrows,

and melancholy everlasting,

as I hold my shattered innocence.

I've lost some pieces over time,some I've tossed away,

others cut my hand without mercy,

and with my tears mixing in the wounds,

I put those back where they lay.

Time.

They say time is precious,That time is of the essence,

But what is this illusion?

What is time?

It goes by, they say,But I don't see anything.

They even say,How time flies,Does it have wings?

Never have I seen it,Never have I understood it's physical being.

But I do know some things,I know the time that I'm away from you.

Time is precious.It is of the essence.But no time is worth my time,

Unless that time is spent with you.How time weighs heavily on my heart.

Oh, how time does eat away at me.Time is not physical, but rather spiritual,

For no time is more spiritual then when you're with me.

Incomplete

With out a thought to spare.
My life seems incomplete,since you left me in despair.
I'm tangled up in you,With the thoughts of our past,
I try not to reminiscebut my mind moves to fast.
In my dreams I am lost in your eyes.
I'm swallowed by your smile.
I'm tortured by your lies.
I'm tangled up in you.
Whatever you have done?
What spell have you cast?
What game have you won?
I'm tangled up in you.

I fall....

The deeper I go into love.I feel like I'm falling from heaven above.

It feels like an ocean, water rushing down my face.Drowning, a sensation is all I tasteThe deeper I go into loveIt seems so magicalIt's warm and pleasant, like falling into sea.

The deeper I go, I have to keep goingIt seems like being near a warm fire place.

A hurricane and you're being carried away.

The deeper I go into loveI'm lost, I can't find my way out.

The deeper I go into love makes me want to shout.

I want to sing a song that never ends.I'll go deeper time and time again.

Like Air

I lost something.

A very important part of me.

The worst part is that I probably never had it.

He came into my life a cool breeze.

Everyone knows that you can't catch air.

But I'm a fool and yes I tried.

And just when I thought I had him,

he slipped right through my fingers.

Like Air.

Opinionated..

Some people have different views,

On this feeling we call love.

Some may call it harsh; a waste of time,Others say beautiful;

symbolic to a dove.

So should we treat it valued?

Should we treat it nice?Should we give up everything to obtain it,

A whole lost world of sacrifice?Some say yes and some say no,

To let this feeling in.The forgotten feelings could always fade,

And yet come right back again.It does not take forever long,

To make a brand-new start.

It only takes the burning desire,

To try with all your heart.

Without a though

With out a thought to spare.

My life seems incomplete,since you left me in despair.

I'm tangled up in you,With the thoughts of our past,

I try not to reminiscebut my mind moves to fast.

In my dreams I am lost in your eyes.

I'm swallowed by your smile.I'm tortured by your lies.

I'm tangled up in you.Whatever you have done?

What spell have you cast?What game have you won?I'm tangled up in you.

Reminded of your laughterNot to have forgotten your silenceMy heart broken with your slander.I'm tangled up in you.

Warmed by your kissesMissing your skilled touchCasting pennies while making silent wishes.

I'm tangled up in you.

Longing for your return.

I love you

This poem was written by Iliana and myself.....Thanks Iliana!



I love you.
Those are the words that open my thoughts, my heart, and my soul.Those are the words that fill my head, this book, and the holeThat continued to grow with every mistake I made, every person that I lostLeft me with a debt that my mind could not pay, so my heart had to pay the cost.Those are the words that are my gift, my nepenthe, and my pain.Those are the words that make me happy, make me crazy, and make me sane.
I love you.
Those are the words that open my thoughts to happiness and sorrow.The joy of being with you today and fear of losing you tomorrow.Those are the words that open my heart up to youTo show you how I feel about everything you do.Those are the words that open my soul and everything inside.All the feelings that I have and all the pain that I hide.
I love you.

I want..

I want to be a lost poem in a stranger's coat pocket that conveys the importance of you,

To assure you of my desire,

To assure you of my dreams.

I want all the possibilities of you in writing.

I want to give you your reflection.

I want your eyes on me.

I want everything before you to follow us

And leave a trail behind us.

I want never to say good-bye to you,

Even on the street corner nor phone.I want. . . . . .

I want so muchI'm breathless.

Goodbye

At first when we met

We said hi

Now we're still friends

But we've said goodbye

I gave you a chance

And you rejected

You said it's not good right now

And you stand corrected

You see what you've lost

At least I hope you do

You see what others can have

But not you

Incognizant 2

You would think by now, I would know my way around,I shouldn't miss you so badly, I should be on familiar ground.

How many more lonely years, must meander by,until I learn the lesson, it does no good to cry.What manner of iron will, must some people possess,

to be always looking forward, to never accept regress.

Perhaps if I was willing, to let someone take me by the hand,

they could show me a happy place, in this unfamiliar land.Perhaps I'm only homesick, for all the joys that once were mine,

I must accept that they and you, belong to another place and time.

But I know that deep within my heart, there's a place where only you reside.

Incognizant

Even normal day to day things become alien when you are lost inside yourself. The struggles to regain a sense of ourselves when we have long been part of another person is a test of our ability to navigate in a strange new world





when the pain of loneliness comes, it knows that is where I hide.
So if sometimes it seems to you, I'm clinging to the past,it's mostly because I can't yet accept, that our love didn't last.
No matter how hard I try, I've yet to get over you,for the part of me that's still alive, believes you love me too.
Maybe there will come a day, when that part will finally die,and feeling strong with a heart reborn, a new love I will finally try.
And what a splendid day that will be, when I awaken to discover,
I'm happily learning a great new land,
with a great new friend and lover

Without Change

The lines flow through me,

They make their own rhymes.

I am only their voiceTheir defense through the times.

You need to listenTo stop and thinkAll these words have meanings

They don't stop at the brink.Pass on what you hearFlow it through,

let it tell.

You are their only prison breakTheir freedom from Hell.

FInd Yourself

I thought I was normal,

I thought I was cool,

I thought I abided by everyones rules...

Now I realize as the time goes by,

I should have thought about everyone else...

For a time they were there,For a time they all cared,

But then came a time when I just disappeared...

I blocked it all out,I refused to see,What I kept all locked up inside of me,

It all seemed so stupid,

It all seemed insane,

But then again I was just the same...

My Mask

+

I hide behind a mask

You can't see my faceLooking at first glance

I'm in a happy placeThe truth is, that's a lie

But you can't really tellthat in the back of my mind

I think the world should rot in hellWhat's the point of living

If we are all going to die

What's the point of being happy

If in the end we're going to cry

But this is something no one sees

This is something no one knows

And yet deep inside of me

This feeling of hatred grows

So even though this mask reveals a happy side of me,

I use the mask as a shield to look at what others can never see.

Plain N Simple

I love you

more than words can say

I hope you will never ever go away.

I hope you will stay here

with me

maybe then you

will see how much

I love you

how much I care

Fear..

There she is crying.

As I get closer I realize that she is me.

As I look before her feet I realize that pieces of my life are on the floor.

Just scattered!I don't know what to do.

Do I pick up the pieces or comfort her?But the presence is here.

His face is so very haunting.Now I am alone.

She is gone.My life all its memories are scattered to the wind.

The darkness is closing in all around me.

I don't know which way to go.I am lost.

All I can do is cry with fear.

I can't fight him anymore.I truly am weakened by his presence.

This pain is so real.All these open wounds are slowly killing me.

Are these childish fears or is he really here?My heart is pounding because I realize that he is still a part of me.I close my eyes praying he is gone.

But the touch of him is gone but not what he left behind.

I can't fight these fears anymore because I am still afraid.

Look at what he has done to me.Look at what he has left behind.

A broken, impure child.But I guess because time can't erase this I have no choice but to go down the road alone like I have been doing along.

The tears fall endlessly knowing this is something I have to do alone.

I have been telling myself that he is gone.But he is like my shadow.

Here with me forever and always.You have made me what I am today.

I can't hide these wounds.I can't try anymore to bandage my wounds.

There are too many.The numbness of my broken soul hurts me so deeply.

I can't let the presence take over me anymore.

But it is hard to be strong for I am still afraid of him.Here I am at a crossroad.

Which road will lead to my happiness?Which road will save me before I become undone?I can't live this lie anymore.

I just want your presence to leave me alone.I have to heal.

I can't turn back now.Do I go left or right?

I am blinded by my tears and pain.I am truly stuck here at this crossroad alone.

ILUSION

I dream of you and I

Together in the sand

I dream of you and I

Together forever.

I could share my life with you

As long as you will take me

I could care for you and hold you

Until death due us part.

If I were to lose youI

don’t know how I would live

You are more to me

Than you could ever realize.

I smile and laugh more

Because you put the sunshine back in my life

I want to hold you

Close to my heart.

So whats my fantasy?

I fantasize about a man who holds me during a thunderstorm Lights candles and drops rose petals on the floor Wipes the tears from my eyes when I cry And lets me know how he feels inside Picks me up from work with every intention on making my day less stressful And even though it was stressful, seeing him makes it the best though Argues with me when I need to be set straight But doesn't fall into that masculine-"I'm-the-boss" fate Wants to commit and realizes that commitment means I'm the only one and so is he Doesn't have a fit when I want someone else's company (a friend's of course)Surprises me with breakfast in bed(even if all he can make is eggs)Makes me laugh when I need a pick-me-up Or picks me up when I need one again Someone willing to be themselves with me Someone with who I can be just me Someone who tells me when I'm a cornball And helps me up when I fall Someone who can be cheesy but I don't mind it And when I'm bring my job home, throws a fit He holds me when we're sleeping and after we make love He understands that I need it, and knows when its just too much He hugs me in the morning time, despite the harshness of morning breath-(laugh)He loves me when I'm prosperous, and is still around when nothing is left He loves me for me, and doesn't ask me to change anything but the extremely bad He holds my hand when I'm happy, and squeezes it when I'm sad He wants me to love him, and doesn't run when I say so Because he'll treat me like a woman,